Save Green / &I'm Green; Fill me in

Wednesday, October 24, 2007

The missing feeling

Emotion/s: The missing-like-feeling strikes back

Current Song: Show Me The Meaning Of Being Lonely by Backstreet Boys

Okays...I had myself a chat with Anis yesterday, the longest so far since the break up. Things went out just fine, and as always she kept telling me "Can't tell. It's secret. LOL.", which is so irritating. But nevermind, we're not together anymore so why should I bother, right?

Yesterday I felt rather uneasy when I get myself back online in AuditionSEA for a while. There I saw my character was in a new costume; a black suit set with a pair of black wings. Cool...

...and yes, a PM from her (different, yet new nick), telling me that she missed me so much.

...I was touched, driven mad like hell. Seriously, I almost my sanity back then. I don't know what happened...and confused.

...and yes, I missed her to. A part of me missed her so much. But I choose to stand on my ground, fighting myself from getting back to her...

...damn it! I'm so confused!

Another part of me wants her back badly. This is absolutely no-point! She won't accept me anymore, and I don't think I want us to be together anymore...and become just friends.

...and I don't know....I'm so confused.

Almighty God, please help me. Don't let me lose my sanity over this tiny speck of problem. You know best, so guide your puny servant here to a better way of thinking and decision. Please give me your hidayah...I beg you.

Her nick in MSN "I swear If you come back In my life I'll b thr till de end of time Come back to me Back into my life I'll keep you rite By my side...(not finished)" ...

...it's disturbing and turned me upside down.

I wonder if she still reads my blog....

Ah, well...hopefully I can still live my day as always...

Anis, I still miss you, silently...

♠/MY Green Personalities

Khair a.k.a Gypsydres
Talks as much as he observes
As emo as his gh3ys.
Hard as rock and twice as sensitive :)

♣/ The Green Hobbies

Anime, manga, games~~
Cosplay~~ (just started)
Writing poems and stuffs
Reading stuffs
Slacking :p
Chatting (I'm talkative XD)
ParaPara Paradise
Initial D arcade (not pro) ^^"

...and the rest you ask yourself.